Archive for May, 2010
Race, Hair Cut and Night Out
by Matt on May.26, 2010, under Blogs
Well its Wednesday, middle of the week and so I guess I had better update my blog, though to be perfectly honest it is becoming more of a chore each week.
I am sure that you will all be delighted to hear that slowly my ankle is getting better. But I am still not able to go to the torture chamber which I have mixed feelings about. On the upside I have more time, am not constantly exhausted, on the downside I am having to watch what I eat more closely, am paranoid about getting fatter again and in a masochistic way kind of miss going. Still all back to normal next week.
Thursday saw a friend of ours coming over to visit, we had meant to meet up for the past two weeks so it was good that he finally made it. We began by chatting, catching up (which means bitching all out mutual friends) drinking a glass of wine, playing with the Rat Boy who does insist on being centre of attention at every given minute. So it was rather jolly, then P got in (Chuckles this is your cue to fast forward), and so it was decided (you getting where this is going? as soon as P is mentioned we all know that food is rampaging its way into the conversation) that we would go to eat, so off down to the Prospect we headed. But when we got there, and had settled in, we were told they had finished doing food, how crap is that? So off we went, bit of a good job as well as on the way out P noticed that a freak we didn’t like was there, no doubt touting for business! So instead we went to River View where it was so nice that we sat on the veranda to have dinner, it was really nice.
Friday and that Buzzy was due to come round so we met in the West End, which caused the usual confusion as she 
has all the directional sense of a drunken and high worm. Honestly she could get lost in a round room, whenever we 
meet you have to either go find her or meet her somewhere she has been at least a dozen times. But she is rather lovely so its worth it (I have to write that or she will get all upset 
She was going to be staying at our place so brought a bloody great big backpack that made her look like a snail. We got back to our place, that being mine and P not mine and Buzzy’s (Chuckles be warned, P was mentioned again). We headed to Canary Wharf as P wanted to go back to Jamie Oliver’s Italian restaurant, but when we got there (despite my saying we should book and P not doing so!) we were told there would be a ninety minute wait, well its a given that if I waited that long I would be too drink to eat. So we headed into the wharf further and found a Smollemnskys, I had never noticed it before, I really should train the Rat to be a guide dog though have a feeling he would only guide me towards the park and wherever he could get food from. So we ate there and it was really nice.
has all the directional sense of a drunken and high worm. Honestly she could get lost in a round room, whenever we meet you have to either go find her or meet her somewhere she has been at least a dozen times. But she is rather lovely so its worth it (I have to write that or she will get all upset She was going to be staying at our place so brought a bloody great big backpack that made her look like a snail. We got back to our place, that being mine and P not mine and Buzzy’s (Chuckles be warned, P was mentioned again). We headed to Canary Wharf as P wanted to go back to Jamie Oliver’s Italian restaurant, but when we got there (despite my saying we should book and P not doing so!) we were told there would be a ninety minute wait, well its a given that if I waited that long I would be too drink to eat. So we headed into the wharf further and found a Smollemnskys, I had never noticed it before, I really should train the Rat to be a guide dog though have a feeling he would only guide me towards the park and wherever he could get food from. So we ate there and it was really nice.The reason that Buzzy was staying is that we were both volunteering at the Race for Life (a 5km race for women in aid of Cancer research, now please remember that as I will be mentioning it again in a few weeks and don’t want to have to explain it all again) at regents Park, and had to be there by 06:30. We did almost make it as well but when we came out of the tube we both wanted to go to the toilet. Have you ever tried to find a public toilet in London? Its a nightmare and so badly catered for (if you will excuse the bad choice of words) as there are few and far
between toilets to use. So I came up with a cunning plan, at least I thought it was. I said lets use the Portaloos at the Race for Life area. So we sneaked up the back way and got to them, to find they were locked, but fear not my wily (yes it is one l) had a solution, use a coin to unlock them, so we went there, well I did, Buzzy just sat in the toilet but couldn’t go, sounded rather trumpy though. We then got on with helping to set up the course (having done our duty by testing the portaloos were in working order, though think Buzzys must have been a bit melted) and for some obscure and irrational reason the Event organiser we were working with put Buzzy in charge, it was like asking Ronan Keating tom keep his flies up, just amusing as she wandered around aimlessly asking people to do things but doing them herself, she even at one point put the bins in the wrong place, she is so sweet and funny. We were after the course was set up then allocated the job of Course Marshall, and Buzzy drew the short straw and had to have a walkie talkie, which was so funny. As we went to our posts wee were separated, and yet I could see her in the distance heading for her post, well I say heading she got lost again and took an age to find the florescent large sign posted to a post saying Marshall point 14. This was after she was asked to stop talking so much into the walkie talkie, oh how I did laugh.
between toilets to use. So I came up with a cunning plan, at least I thought it was. I said lets use the Portaloos at the Race for Life area. So we sneaked up the back way and got to them, to find they were locked, but fear not my wily (yes it is one l) had a solution, use a coin to unlock them, so we went there, well I did, Buzzy just sat in the toilet but couldn’t go, sounded rather trumpy though. We then got on with helping to set up the course (having done our duty by testing the portaloos were in working order, though think Buzzys must have been a bit melted) and for some obscure and irrational reason the Event organiser we were working with put Buzzy in charge, it was like asking Ronan Keating tom keep his flies up, just amusing as she wandered around aimlessly asking people to do things but doing them herself, she even at one point put the bins in the wrong place, she is so sweet and funny. We were after the course was set up then allocated the job of Course Marshall, and Buzzy drew the short straw and had to have a walkie talkie, which was so funny. As we went to our posts wee were separated, and yet I could see her in the distance heading for her post, well I say heading she got lost again and took an age to find the florescent large sign posted to a post saying Marshall point 14. This was after she was asked to stop talking so much into the walkie talkie, oh how I did laugh.After we had finished our work we then headed down to the West End briefly, by this point Dave had brought the Rat to me so we had him with us, before going to Buzzy’s flat. She wanted to change and get more clothes for Sunday as we had decided she would be staying Saturday night too. I have to say her flat is rather lovely, I liked it, and the bed is really comfy, which would explain why I promptly fell asleep. The only set back is that its in Zone 3 and about 4 miles from a tube station, but we got the bus back to the station, only Buzzy with her usual sense of direction got us off a stop too early!!
Sunday came and Buzzy went. P and I had to take the rat for his monthly hair cut and shower. The groomer was a 
new one so we were a little apprehensive, okay a lot. I remember when I was young and I got an embarrassing hair cut so didn’t want little Milo to have to suffer the jibes and jokes from all his friends about bad haircuts. But as it turned out we need not have
worried as the new one is rather excellent and did a great job so little Man is strutting around like the cat that got the cream showing off. But as usual he managed to whine and cry his way through the whole ninety minutes it took, he is quite unbelievable as he just cries from habit as doesn’t even realise he is doing it I done think. Still he was a happy little chap once it was all done and he said he felt a lot cooler with his hair shorter.
new one so we were a little apprehensive, okay a lot. I remember when I was young and I got an embarrassing hair cut so didn’t want little Milo to have to suffer the jibes and jokes from all his friends about bad haircuts. But as it turned out we need not have worried as the new one is rather excellent and did a great job so little Man is strutting around like the cat that got the cream showing off. But as usual he managed to whine and cry his way through the whole ninety minutes it took, he is quite unbelievable as he just cries from habit as doesn’t even realise he is doing it I done think. Still he was a happy little chap once it was all done and he said he felt a lot cooler with his hair shorter.So we thought we would take him for a walk up the canal, we had intended to walk all the way to Victoria Park and were due to meet Dave there. But half way Milo refused to move and sat down in protest saying it was too hot for him to walk and that it was not at all fair. So we got on the bus instead and went to Victoria Park with him and all had lunch in a beer garden which was rather nice.
I was sat at my desk yesterday, working exceedingly hard of course, when I got an email to say that there was a package for me, oh great a box of paper clips me thinks and trundles down the stairs, only to discover that little Buzzy has sent some flowers to P and I for being such wonderful hosts (which if truth be told is true in the case of P but but not quite so for me) at the weekend, how sweet is that then?Last night it was time for a catch up with Emma, which is always fun if a little, or a lot drunken. As the weather was so nice,and lets face it that’s quite a rarity and every chance should be grabbed with both hands as you never know when the next nice day may be. We sat in Soho Square with a bottle of wine, and very nice company the bottle was too. This old lady came past and decided to adopt us as her new friends and sat there chattering away whilst her two little Yorkshire Terriers terrorised the rest of the park, she was quite
eccentric and very fabulous. We then went and decided to grace the Golden Union (despite its kinky sounding name it is not a sex act but a great fish and chip place) and ate there before heading to a unbelievably bad bar. It is on Old Compton street and was full of very badly dressed, ugly and awful people, but that didn’t matter as Emma was too busy getting life counselling from me, how mad can one girl be, I believe that after the experience she is now in suicide avoidance counselling. It would be indiscreet to name the bar or say its called admiral Duncan so I wont tell you.
eccentric and very fabulous. We then went and decided to grace the Golden Union (despite its kinky sounding name it is not a sex act but a great fish and chip place) and ate there before heading to a unbelievably bad bar. It is on Old Compton street and was full of very badly dressed, ugly and awful people, but that didn’t matter as Emma was too busy getting life counselling from me, how mad can one girl be, I believe that after the experience she is now in suicide avoidance counselling. It would be indiscreet to name the bar or say its called admiral Duncan so I wont tell you.BOOM! was as great, as ever, it was really bouncy this week and had me toe tapping my way to work. That chuckles does know how to spin a tune and get the party started in your ears, its fantastic.
Bye for now.
Ankles, Dinners and Big Shops
by Matt on May.19, 2010, under Blogs
I am having to write this weeks entry from home as I have a badly sprained ankle. Those of you who know me will see just how ‘me’ this is. Yesterday I heard that there was a nice new suit on the shop floor, and we do lovely suits, so I rushed down to see it, as I was rushing down the main staircase where all the pictures of past patrons are, as I came to Winston Churchill my ankle twisted and went from under me, still didn’t get to see the suit! So now under Doctors (not Dr Who) orders I am having to rest it at home.
Last Wednesday evening we were supposed to go to the movies, but as usual P said didn’t feel like it, funny enough he did feel like (fast forward Chuckles) eating so we met at the DLR station and went to a place that he likes. Its called Noodle Street and is Chinese food (now there’s a news flash) but only 2 of the people working there are Oriental, the rest are white, or Caucasian if we are being political;y correct, not that I am ever. Was pretty nice though, its really clean there which is always good.
We had jolly good fun on Friday, we met up with friends. We had not seen them for a bout a year as we have all been very busy so not had a chance to hook up. So finally we had arranged a date and set up a place, you guessed it, its a restaurant, a nice Thai, place not person. Our friend is pregnant and was first time we had seen her since she found out she was pregnant. I not having Facebook didn’t know she was pregnant until the previous day, this gave me two thought, isn’t it a sad world where if you don’t have a profile on a social network site you don’t know what’s going on (especially if you’re as nosy as I am) and also P has Facebook so why didn’t he tell me!!!! But it was really good to see our friends and catch up with all they are doing, and to hear about their cats.
Sunday is Little Ps day off so we always try to spend it together, this past one was no exception. We have wanted a wardrobe for ages, we still use clothing rails which admittedly were fashionable, but in the 80’s, but they don’t keep the clothes clean or that tidy, in fact they get creased to fuck. So we got on the train to go to hell, or as its known IKEA. It takes so long to go round that place, never can understand why people would go and spend a day there, its mad crazy. And I have never seen so many chavs in one place in my life, its like a sample sale at a track suit factory. But on the upside we did, after looking for about an hour, find a couple of wardrobes that we like so now all we need to do is to order them.
After we had escaped from IKEA we headed over the road to Costco, it transpires (isn’t that a lovely word) that people who work for CPW are entitled to membership at Costco, and we like it there. So we got our memberships and decided to have a look around, always a mistake if you go there. We said we will only get a few bits, but ended up with 2 big IKEA bags full. We had to carry them home, well to the train station then from train station to home, and my one marked all my shoulder, but I suffered in silence and didn’t once moan, well maybe once or twice!
Oh wow, I have been listening to BOOM! whilst typing this up and my fingers have been tapping along with my foot, only one as cant move the other. The tunes this week were awesome, absolutely spell bindingly, and chair dancing, I am so pleased my desk chair has wheels, I have been looking like a para Olympian wheeling round the room to the kicking tunes.
Haven’t mentioned Buzzy as not seen her, but wanted to say hi as she had a hard time (quite literally ) last week, so all say a howdy to her to cheer her up, I will see her this weekend so that will no doubt make her month worthwhile.
Bye bye.
A Short Entry
by Matt on May.12, 2010, under Blogs
Well this may well be my last entry, as last week I asked people to email and let me know if it was worth continuing this and only 3 people actually got in touch, so I am hesitant to continue this as it is increasingly hard work and takes time, it hardly seems worth it for only 3 people, though those 3 are treasured.
Last Friday (Chuckles feel free to fast forward at this point) P and I decided that we had not been to the Prospect of Whitby for quite some time, don’t know why as we both like it there. Between us we had had quite a tiring week, I was at work until almost midnight on the Wednesday as a few of us were re-merchandising the shop floor, getting our hands dirty!! P has his new branch so was pretty busy to, I was also going to torture chamber (though somehow remaining massive and still having my stomach in a different time zone), looking after the Rat Boy. So all in all was quite a tiring week so off down to The Prospect we went. It was rather pleasant as we sat and chatted whilst we ate, something we don’t get to do as often as would like. Though when the meals came I preferred the look of what P had!!!
Saturday came and I had no idea what I wanted to do, I was as clueless as ever, quite happy in my own little dream world, ambling around. Then my best friend David came over to shatter my peace so I decided that as we had not been to Greenwich for quite some time that we could go there. We could look round the town, look at the market and go and see P in his shiny new store. So off we went, had to get the buss as the DLR (oh how I hate TFL) was not running properly, not that it ever is. Rat Boy insisted on his own seat then decided he wanted the window seat so climbed all over me letting me know just how much of a inconvenience I was. Once we got there it started to rain so we had to go to the undercover market as he would refuse to walk in the rain, I often wonder who is the dog and who the master!!!! But all in all we had a nice time, we met P from work and trundled off home for the monotony that P and David call entertainment and I call tedious television.
Sunday we were due to meet some friends who we had not seen in ages, in fact over a year I believe. So we headed to the West End so could meet them. We headed to China Town (Chuckles skip next couple of lines) as they had never tried Dim Sum, what sheltered life’s they must have. Jolly nice it was too, I always enjoy it though and loathed as I am to say anything nice it was very good to see them again, though one of them diplomatically pointed out I had put weight on, despite the fact I am actually losing it. So no fucking Christmas car for him then.
We then headed to have a drink, but Friendly Society was closed so we ended up at The Yard, that’s a pub not some random persons garden, and sat out side as one of the friends and P have the disgusting habit of smoking. We were supposed to just have the one drink but it ended up that we didn’t eave until 9.00 and I was somewhat tipsy, though not nearly as much as our friend who was drunk, bloody light weight, must be because he is so old.
Have you been subscribing to BOOM!? It is always amazingly fantastic but this week it out did itself, or rather Chuckles out did himself, it was mind blowingly amazingly fabulous, loved it so much, I felt like doing a Christopher walken on the Fat Boy Slim video.
Unfortunately P and I have not been able to go out the past couple of days as our little angel has not been well. The night before last he started to vomit and have diarrhoea, he was shaking and looked all sad and forlorn, it was horrible to see. We cuddled him, reassured him and doted on him, well more than usual. So yesterday Dave called the vet and was told he had probably picked something up. He has to eat this special food for three days which he isn’t overly fond of so I have to feed it to him by hand, but what he is disgusted at is that he isn’t allowed any treats either, he is forever telling me he is starving and that he may get malnourished. He is looking very sad for himself, but he looks as if he is on the mend which is the main thing, especially as I want to go to the movies this evening!!!!
Bye bye and please leave a message or email if you read this.
Eating Through the Week and Kinky Buzzers
by Matt on May.05, 2010, under Blogs
Well well its a short working week for us, as was Bank Holiday on Monday.
Before I start this weeks entry I would like to say that I am finding writing this each week quite laborious (look it up Buzzy). I am not sure how many people actually bother to read it so would like to find out whether its worthwhile still doing it. Please can you send me an email, to mattb@mattunplpugged.com , to let me know if you read it and if its worth me continuing to write it. Basically its hard to be witty every week!!!!
Last Wednesday P and I went to the theatre, I am on this mailing list and they offered tickets to go see Hair for just fifteen pounds, bargain I thought so snapped two of them up. I am very happy, and somewhat aghast, to say that P was there on time, in fact he was early so we had time to go and look at his favourite type of shop, a food store in China Town. Neither of us had heard anything about the play, musical whatever, so didn’t know what to expect. I have to say that its a really good show and we both thoroughly enjoyed it. P even changed his BBM (Blackberry Messenger for those technophobes out there) status to how much he liked it, but then he changes his BBM status all the time ‘Milo is doing a pooh’ I am eating’ ‘I am sleeping’. Back to the musical I guess. It had the most audience participation I have seen in the theatre, with the cast actually coming out and into the audience, walking on the chairs, it was really good. I would highly recommend going to see it.
On Thursday P surprised me by asking if he could take me to dinner after work, I was very pleased (and not just because I am a fat pig) as it was a really sweet and romantic thing to do and not the kind of thing he does that often. We went to Jamie Oliver’s place, restaurant not house (and not Sainsbury) in Canary Wharf as we had wanted to see what it was like. And I have to say it was jolly nice indeed. The food was very tasty (how many times can I use the word very?) and contrary to what we thought it was going to be like it wasn’t expensive at all. We of course had to enjoy the full Italian experience so had to have a bottle of wine, torturous though it was we endured the suffering and finished it, more me than P finishing it if truth be told!
Okay so looking at my diary this weeks entry is going to look like a good food guide, and then I ponder, ‘why am I such a fat git’ eeemmm let me see now……..
On Friday P wanted to go to the Thai place in Stratford, its great there. In the daytime it is a cafe and at night it is a Thai restaurant that does authentic Thai food and very reasonably priced indeed, so its as if you’re in Bangkok but without the riots and tear gas. So we called our best friend, and the Rat Boys walker, Dave, the happy (he can be quite grumpy) and asked if he wanted to come as we had not seen him all week and were curious as to how he was, well actually I was more interested in how Milo had been in he daytime all week. it is crazy but every time we go there we make the same mistake and order too much, the portions are really big there. Though I have to say I did suggest we have soup for starter and not the filling one that P ordered but hey who am I to suggest such a thing, though he was paying so guess its his prerogative!
Saturday I was at the salon so that was jolly good. Errol had not been there for quite a few weeks as had been in different places (talk about stating the obvious) so it was nice (almost wrote very again) to catch up with him, but he had back to back clients so couldn’t do my hair, which is becoming a nightmare as not had it done for a while (see beginning of sentence for reason) so I am having it done tomorrow now, and I cant wait. its Summer so I think I am going to go short, my hair that is, am not having my legs shortened.
Sunday was miserable, raining, why does it rain on the weekend and sunny all week, there is something wrong there, and if there is a God then he has a weird and warped sense of humour. Our friend Worm came round on Sunday, it is always funny when he comes as he brings Rat Boy a toy (which the Rat then takes and proceeds to destroy in about twenty minutes and the looks up and wonders where his new little soft friend has gone). So when Worm walks in Milo goes mad and jumps all over the place, this time he went one further and got into Worms bag and was pulling this soft toy out forcibly, and as ever he made short measure of it. It was (okay very) nice to catch up with Worm as he thinks he is always busy so you hardly ever hear from him, which I think is a lie, how the hell can anyone be too busy to talk to me!!!!
We then went to the West End and met that little Buzzy (she just cant get enough of us, obsessed she is, I love having a wee stalker . We had been to Oxford Street and shopping so by this point were quite hungry so went to the Chinese cafe (piling on the calories again) and had a quick bite to eat, lots of seafood in nut sauce was what I wanted!
. We had been to Oxford Street and shopping so by this point were quite hungry so went to the Chinese cafe (piling on the calories again) and had a quick bite to eat, lots of seafood in nut sauce was what I wanted!We took Buzzy first of all to this gay sex shop, which she loved, she was as if gone to heaven, dribbling over all the dildos and her eyes watering at the thought of some of them, as you can see from the picture she was quite at home there. We had to drag her out of there and the only way she would come (literally I would think) is the fact we mentioned we would go to Ann Summers!!! We first of all took her to the gay bar she likes though, Friendly Society as she does love it there, well lets face it she loves anywhere that they serve alcohol. Then we treated her to a trip to Ann Summers, where I was astounded as she knew exactly how every single vibrator worked, um too much information I thought as she darted across the store (like a rat up a drainpipe) at the sight of lickable body paint.
How bloody toe tappingly wonderful was this weeks BOOM! I listened to it on the way to work and looked a complete fairy (no comments please) as was almost skipping my way to the tube station it was that funky, so cool.
So that’s it for another week, a week gone, another here, and another to come. Please do not forget to email and let me know if you read this as if there aren’t many I will stop this blog as its rather hard work being this entertaining. Tatty bye for now.
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